With nooothing going down in Concrete HQ, (its been a quiet week with basically no riding and lots of shit jobs to sort) I am forced once more to look offshore for inspiration. Look no further than Italy!

Yes, this weekend sees the UCI World Cycling Tour finals in Trento Italy. You may remember Trento from such NoMADness as the Charly Gaul Gran Fondo back in mid July (yes, we have been on the road that long folks). Well, this weekend shit is going to be getting VERY real in the Masterton of Italy (that’s not really a compliment FYI), as some of the best amateur cyclists in the world line up in an attempt to pull each others bib shorts down.

Two such riders are previous Nomad co-stars, who will be pitting themselves against not only the savagery of the global competition, but also one of the hardest race courses you’re likely to find on an amateur one day race – over 112km’s they will cover 3,000m of climbing!!! WTF?!! First up into the game zone, Clarso:

"Listen up everyone, my friend has no anatomy and STOPPED on the climb! Throw stuff at his head"

Getting some practice in for this weekend – Victory gussets welded in under the arms

You may remember him from such trips as Dirty Nomad does Italy… He was the one ripping my legs off on a daily basis, catching me taking an embarrassing break on the Stelvio and smashing his way into numerous Strava top 10’s on large Italian climbs. My tip – Clarso is going to beast this and do quite nicely… He climbs like the SR71 Blackbird and descends like Nibbles, so well suited to the horrors of the Trento course.

Next into the heat of the cycling version of Running Man, the Goat:

"Lets go diiiickhead..."

“I can do more watts taking a piss than you can sprinting diiiickhead”

You may remember him from such ‘adventures’ as the Genting Goat hunt… A good call to train on that hill and while he won’t have to contend with homocidal Proton’s flying at him, he will have juicy Italian climbing machines to overcome. My tip – If he keeps his hands on the handlebar and plays his cards right (i.e. sucking a lot of wheel) then the Goat may be able to spring a surprise at the end. However, this isn’t exactly a sprinter finale and just getting to the top of the 18km finishing climb without crying or soiling yourself will be considered a good outcome.

A MASSIVE Dirty good luck boys for this weekend – There really is no tomorrow, so ride your nut sacs into the nose of your saddles and send me some decent pics of the suffering.

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