With the colony drawing first blood yesterday on getting a guest report up, it’s no surprise that today is about the Empire striking back… Yes, fresh off a fantastic defeat to the AB’s, today’s report is brought to you from the other side of the world… Our first DN post from England!

Well, sort of an English post, but provided by resident kiwi and photographer extraordinaire, the Shepster. As you’d expect, his shots are a few steps up from the normal Dirty Nomad iPhone 4s shakey hand efforts that I manage. Shep decided to hit the commute required down the A3/M25/M3 to get to Swinley forest. Behold the gratuitous Cannondale money shot:

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German rubber – Made from split condoms…

In stark contrast to the Perth report, Shep and the Gabster set out for their ride with the temp a brisk (cock shrivelling) 2 degrees… Faaaaark… You have to LOVE mountain biking to hit the trails at that temp (approx 35 degs less than what Herr Doktor was riding in), so kudos, its pretty much planet Hoth:

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I believe the ground may be frozen? Stiff upper lip then chaps…

Trail report outlines that the trails are compacted clay/gravel mix and super hard. Can also be as slippery as a sheep’s bum when the morning dew is on it. I am not sure how long it took Shep to line this photo up (I suspect hours to get the lighting just SO), but as you can see, some more inspiring shots taken here… Looks fun if you hit it at speed:

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A few line options to be taken here… If your brain hasn’t frozen solid

And, here is a look that I haven’t seen since I last ran a traffic light on a group ride, good to see she still has it on demand, the Gabster carving it up on the girlie Scalpel:

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“Fucking hell guys…”

Word up is that there are two trails on offer once you finish the commute out from London, with both dishing up berms and some tabletops… Intel indicates that this is a good place to ride if the weather has been shit, so, all the time in other words. Hard to diss it when you get shots like this action coming direct from Shepzilla:

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Another Jekyll in the wilderness… If this shot had come from anyone else I would have accused it of being photoshopped

Clearly I need to get a new camera… Or just take Shep on every ride. Nice work Team Kiwi/GB on providing a unique and chilly trail report. Looks cold enough to make me want to don the Koala suit! Assume that the Tea and Scones came on the commute home? Jolly good!!

Also of note, its now 2-0 to the Mountain Bikers on the DN Global Network guest reports. Roadies: Get off your asses and go for a ride!!

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