DRRU Monday

It may be a mega doldrum period for decent blogging material at present, but I have managed to busk, beg, steal, scrape and create my way to a semi-passable Monday DRRU today. After mainly beating back the man-flu to allow 200 or so KM’s to be ridden over the weekend, things should be starting to look up this week (touch wood).

First up today… Its hard to ignore a new entrant into the COTY awards… Step forward Ricky Ricco. Yes, being busted two or three times for juicing, given basically a life ban and almost killing himself with a bad blood transfusion wasn’t enough for him, so the dude has now been busted by Italian Police trying to buy more gear in an exchange that took place in a Maccas car park of all places! If that doesn’t scream ‘CUNT’ I’m not sure what does:

“Hey Ricco, race you to the fridge!”…. “Pfffft Danny, I can climb this with my mouth closed, think we’ll ever get busted?”

I don’t really get on the soap box about these gimps getting on the gear, but one has to marvel at the case study of Fuckwittery that Ricco manages to roll out. Most people would call it quits after being busted twice, almost dying of a bad transfusion and being banned. Apparently he was planning on a global Strava KOM assault of the most famous climbs in the world. It seems you need to buy $15k worth of Juice to do so… So, if you have a KOM nicked by this retard in the next 12 months, flag it with the reason “Cheating Cunt” listed in the box, Strava will understand.

At the opposite end of the scale now, for a total contrast and a flash back to last year, this little video from 5 Passes has recently come out. If you like road riding, travel, riding as a team and above all, scenery – Then this is a race for you and your crew to have on the list at some stage. There may be a brief shot at the 3.26 mark of some bearded guy pulling along the Rivet Racing train, heading to the dreaded Arthurs Pass TT:

Speaking of contrasts, the Hawk sent through this RIPPING photo of him shredding POW over the weekend, appropriately attired of course as a DN Global Brand Ambassador deluxe (not to mention he gave birth to the much loved logo), carving it up and no doubt swamped by Japanese girls volleyball teams in the lift queue:

BOOM – Make my snow dirty

Makes me oddly homesick for Japan and I don’t even live there. I decided to counter by holding a Mad Man Marathon inspired DN/Don Draper Ad Revenue brain storming session on the Private Dirty Launch. Utilising the best form of recovery, Tyrrell’s Sea Salt and Balsamic Vinegar chips after a century on the bike and reclaiming a KOM that I lent out to a team mate for a couple of days:

Reasonably possible that was the second bag…

There must have been an Assassin on board though, I found myself being fished out of the sea by a French fishing vessel, who removed a couple of slugs from my torso before nursing me back to health. I seemed to have lost my memory though and had to head to Geneva in a mini with a freaky German chick (BAU) to get my passport from some tight assed Swiss bank. No drama though, I was back in the Global Hub in time to get my ass dropped at Crazies inside the last KM… Faaaaark… My inability to just sit in and suck wheel like a gobbling uncle still doing me in at the end. The presence of a PRO making for an interesting session. Their ability to close down a break up the road a thing to behold. I instructed the Goat to get recruiting, it was almost compelling:

“Well, we get a good deal on gels and also have the best coffee spot in town… Plus, I can be your masseuse”

Finally today, congrats to Frazzle who managed to make it 2 from 2 on the Malaysian (Masters, 50+) MTB race scene over the weekend… On his birthday no less. Problems arose at the podium though when he was accused of being a Malaysian Hamburglar and issued an infringement notice (by me and the Malaysians) for an enormous identity crisis when he wore a road cycling cap on the MTB podium. Jimmy Smits almost refused to appear in the podium photo, especially after Frazzle begged him to call him ‘Sipowicz’:

Frazzle defuses the situation by claiming its actually a train drivers cap… Jimmy Smits gives the thumbs up

And on that note, its time to start praying for something exciting to happen between now and the next DRRU…